Small World
by Harlequin99
Summary: Based on "A Christmas Carol", the characters of Poison Study come together to form a little christmas treat for all you readers. Join us for an insight in to the horrors and mysteries of Valek's past, present and future. Co-written with KaAaArL.
1. Chapter 1

**So here it is! The first chapter in a new co-story by me and KaAaArL :D who did an AMAZING job with this :D it wouldn't be this good with out you! :) She created the names for his brothers. They're used in her brilliant story Unraveling Worlds, so check that out if you haven't already :D  
**

**It's based on Charles Dickens tale, "A Christmas Carol." but we thought we'd spice it up and change it slightly so they will be plently of twists and turns to keep you interested :D **

**Please let us know what you think, we really appreciate every review! **

**Thanks, **

**Harlequin & KaAarl**

**P.S. Merry Christmas! We hope you have a great time and don't encounter the three ghosts of christmas like poor Valek does! ;) **

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As I entered the Castle after another short trip down to Sitia, I walked straight to my suite. I was back early, so I wouldn't need to report to Ambrose for another two days.

Collapsing into bed, I was drained of energy from my one day trek back from Sitia. I didn't stop to rest so it took less time than usual. But no matter how exhausted I was, and how much my muscles ached with fatigue, I still couldn't stop thinking of the last few days.

Yelena and I had another fight, resulting in me leaving for Ixia early again. We've been arguing a lot recently, usually over a number of things. Our busy schedules meant that we didn't get to spend much time together, something which we both detested but couldn't do anything about.

Times were getting tough. It had been nearly a year before my most recent visit, and since we couldn't send letters to each other for fear of them getting into the wrong hands, there was no means of communication in our long times apart.

Ambrose would only let me have a few days off each year, and most of my visits to Yelena were when I was supposed to be working in Sitia anyway. And on the rare times that Yelena is sent to the castle on business, she's too busy to spend much time with me. We do see each other in the meetings, but that just makes it worse – being able to see each other but not touch and talk. Being in the same room as her, often sitting opposite her, yet unable to wrap her in my arms and show her how much I love her.

Another reason why I hated to be so far away from her is her unusual ability to attract trouble like a magnet, and I hated the possibility of not being able to save her. There's only so much I can do for her from by connecting telepathically, although my immunity to magic has thankfully saved her many of times.

Ambrose doesn't allow Ixia to celebrate Christmas, saying it's unprofessional for military, but they still celebrate the holiday in Sitia. That's the reason I was visiting Yelena actually. I was invited to spend Christmas with her parents. I've never met them before and I was nervous about how they would react knowing their beautiful daughter was in a relationship with the master assassin of Ixia. But I guess I don't have to worry about that now since our fight made me leave the day before.

I couldn't help wondering what I would have being doing had we not got into an argument, what would her parents be like? Would they approve of me? Probably not.

With a sigh, I closed my eyes and tried to drift to sleep, but no matter how hard I tried, Yelena's face kept popping into my mind. Her dazzling green eyes, her beautiful smile. The memories of our time together – before and after we declared our love for each other. All the trouble she got into and how I helped her out of it.

Everything just passing memories. Is that what it's going to be like now? Just passing memories, with out the anticipation and excitement of seeing her again? No looking forward to her next visit? Just a numb, empty feeling.

I opened my eyes to the darkness and sighed in defeat. I knew that despite how exhausted I was, I wasn't getting any sleep tonight. I was about to get up to go to my carving studio, when I noticed a shimmer in the corner of my room. Instinctively I reached under my pillow and pulled out a knife. Aiming it at the intruder, I threatened to throw it. I pulled my arm back and let go of the blade, but it passed right through. And then I recognized who it was. Someone who I hadn't seen in years. Lucian. My oldest brother.

My first thought was, 'Holy shit, it's a ghost!' And then, 'I wonder how Yelena deals with seeing things that aren't really there?'

He looked exactly the same as before he was killed. Except he was slightly transparent and was glowing. Normally I would have teased him about that, but I was still too shocked to form words. All I could do is gawk at him, with my mouth slightly open. I didn't even try to hide my shocked expression. There's no point. My brother could always read me like an open book.

"Well, at least you recognized me. I've seen worse. You didn't run away screaming like a little girl either, that's a start," Lucian said.

That quickly removed any thoughts about running – I was _not_ going to prove him right. "No, I guess not," I said quietly. His eyebrows rose when he heard my voice. Obviously that had changed since the last time he saw me at the age of thirteen.

"My God, you actually grew up. And here I was thinking I'd see my baby brother again." He shook his head in disbelief. "So, are you really an assassin?"

"Yes." I answered him. I was nervous as to what he would think of my career. It wasn't exactly something to be proud of. But he's _dead_. Why should I care what he thinks? But dead or not, he's still my brother.

"Can you speak in more than one-word sentences?" he asked. I hated the fact that he seemed so amused.

"Yes – I mean, of course I can." I corrected myself.

"That's good. Then answer this question for me. Since you are the spitting image of _moa, _then obviously you have the prettiest girl around. Am I right?"

Great, this was just great. My guilt was causing me to hallucinate. Now I was going to confess everything to my hallucination, and then I would go back to Yelena and beg her for forgiveness. Then she would ask me what made me change my mind, and I would tell her about Lucian. She would think I was crazy and leave me. Great. Just Perfect.

"Something happened between you two, and you don't want to tell me about it. Whatever, I'm here for a reason. I have to show you something. I am going to show you your life – the past part of it. And I'm going to help you figure out who you are exactly and what you're after. Also, I get to watch and invade your private life and thoughts without you being able to do anything about it." He finished off his long speech with a smirk.

As if my life couldn't get any worse. Now I had to go back to the past that I had spent all my life trying to block out.

Then – despite my protests – the world melted into a jumble of colours and my room disappeared. The replacement was northern Ixia. I could see a younger me playing with my brothers in the snow. It was getting dark outside and I heard our mother's voice call us from the house.

The other versions of my family walked down the path. I couldn't stop myself from screaming out to them to stop. I knew that the path was leading them to death. But they couldn't hear me.

I felt Lucian's hand come down on my arm and he held me back. I turned see him wearing a sad smile. "It's the past, Valek. There's nothing you can do to change it. Let it go."

"I can't," I finally admitted. "It caused everything in my life to spiral downwards. I became a killer because of those bastards who killed you. I wanted to avenge you, but all I got was a moment of satisfaction. Then I was caught in an unbreakable web and I couldn't find a way out. And now my life is all wrong."

I watched in horror as the two soldiers walked to our door. The loud thumping on the wood echoed through my heart as I knew what was about to happen. All I can do now is watch the horror of my past replay itself. Knowing that there is nothing I can do to stop it.

I watched helplessly as my father argued with the soldiers. I wanted to scream and shout at him not to say the words which caused my brothers deaths. But I knew it was no use. He couldn't hear me, and even if he could. I couldn't change the past. No matter how much it killed me to admit it.

"If I pay the full tax money, then I won't have enough money left to feed my family. Is that what the King wants? His people to starve for the sake of some taxes?"

Without hesitating, the two guards unsheathed the swords and killed my three brothers. No remorse spared. And I felt red hot fury bubble inside me as they laughed to each other.

"Problem solved. Now you have three less mouths to feed." Without thinking, I pulled two knives from my forearms – hidden underneath my nightshirt, and hurled them towards the two guards. The blades went straight through them and disappeared into the wall of the house.

That only made my anger worse. My hands balled into fists and I wanted to kill both of them. I suddenly regretted now killing them before. Even though I knew it was stupid to kill the messengers. Seeing the murder again reignited my fury.

Luckily Lucian wrapped an arm around my shoulder, and my anger started to extinguish.

I don't know what was worse. Actually experiencing the incident first hand, or watching it back like I am now. Watching the painful scene like an onlooker, but at the same time remembering what it felt like. Watching my expression as the worst pain in my life filled through my body. Seeing my parents lose three of their four children in one moment. My mothers' heartbreaking screams and wails pierced my heart as her three sons lie in pools of their own blood, unconscious and empty of life. Dead.

My younger self shied away in the corner – my hands over my face as my body shook with endless sobs. But now, I dared to look down at my brother's bodies. I couldn't look for long though, seeing their pained faces, their lifeless eyes and their blood contrasting against the white snow.

I looked back at myself crying in the corner, long after the soldiers had left. I watched in amazement as a bright white light came down from above and shone straight down on my younger self, it was so bright that me and my brother had to shield our eyes behind our hands. When it dimmed down to a pale blue colour, I looked at my parents. But they were too busy grieving to notice what had happened.

"M...Mother! F...F..Father! D..Did you j..just s..s..see th..that! A b..bright light!" my younger self shouted at them through the tears still streaming down my face. The light had hurt. It had shocked my body violently, and it went numb for a moment.

"Valek!" My Father screamed at me! "How dare you say that? How could you be so disrespectful? Your brothers just died, and all you care about is some damn bloody light! Your mother here is heartbroken, we all are. The least you could do is show some respect!"

"S...sorry F...Father"

"Stop crying!" he smacked me around my face. I even reached out to rub my cheek now, remembering how much it hurt. Both physically and emotionally.

"Well I'll tell you something boy. You are no son of mine! I wish it was you instead of them!"

The scene kept playing over and over in my head. The sounds of the soldiers unsheathing their sharp swords, the piercing of skin and my brothers' screams, echoed in my mind, making my head throb in pain. The brothers I had loved so much, who I had spent all my childhood playing with. Gone. And there's nothing I can do about it. Even though one of my brothers stands next to me now, I know he won't be around for long. Soon I will have to say goodbye to him all over again.

I wanted to run away, not caring what Lucian would think. But his hand on my shoulder stopped me. I knew I needed to stop running away from my past. No matter how much it pains me, I need to be strong.

After that, I was left shaking. Lucian was supporting my weight almost completely. He sat me down on a snow bank. "Are you all right?" he questioned me. My eyes couldn't focus. I was feeling dizzy and nauseous. Suddenly, I turned and retched onto the snow. Clearly, I was not all right. Lucian's eyes widened. "Oh God, what's wrong? Where does it hurt? Do you need help? Are you all right? Do you want me to help you up? Should I go get help? Oh God, this is entirely my fault…"

I smiled at his stream of questions. He was having a small panic attack. Just like when I was a child and he was supposed to be watching me, but I fell and bloodied my hands and knees. But right now, he was looking at me as if I was a lunatic – I was still sitting there, smiling like an idiot.

"I'm fine. That was just… really something."

From then on, the flashes from the past were simpler. Here you could see me training. There I was going around earning money from the royal upper class. And again training, gaining information. Until we stopped again. I hid in a dark hallway. My eyes widened – I knew this place. This was where the rebellion was starting. I had just received my first payment and was taking my shot at Ambrose. I had an inside panic attack as my young-self advanced towards the main room through the shadows.

I managed to sneak into his room without being noticed, I didn't waste anytime before I jumped him, my knife aimed I didn't waste any time before I jumped him, my knife aimed at his heart. What I didn't expect was for him to block the blow with his own knife. I quickly found myself battling for my life against the man that I was hired to kill. Unfortunately for me, he was more skilled with a knife than I was, and since I had expected an easy kill, I hadn't taken a sword with me. I was constantly cursing myself for that. If I hadn't been so cocky and brought more weapons, then maybe I wouldn't have been tied to Ambrose for all these years.

I watched as I closed my eyes, clearly waiting to receive the same death I had brought among many others. But it never came. Instead he carved a C on my chest with my own blade.

"What is your name?" he asked me.

"Valek" my younger self whispered.

"Valek, I am now your Commander and you will work for me and no one else. Understand?"

"Yes, Sir." I whispered. I was scared beyond anything I had ever experienced before. "But there is one man that I want to kill the most. If you can get me to the King, then I will be loyal to you forever."

"No." I whispered as my younger self pledged loyalty to Ambrose. If only I knew how foolish it was. Granted I was able to kill the King and his family and was able to finally let go of my past with the knowledge that I had avenged my brothers.

But I was stupid when I was younger. I was cocky and too caught up in the feeling of killing people, and creating fear to think about my future after killing the King. I had no idea the full extent of my oath to Ambrose.

Lucian stared at me in disbelief. I couldn't help fidgeting under his intense blue gaze – that was where I had gotten my blue eyes. "You pledged your eternal loyalty to a man who almost killed you?" he asked. His voice was emotionless, but I knew there was about to be an explosion.

"Yes, I still work for him now. He's the Commander of Ixia."

"The, _what_?" he shouted. "You helped him take over? You killed the King? How? How could you do that? The King was a powerful magician, how the hell did you manage to kill him without being vaporized."

"Well, remember that flash that you saw in the first vision you showed me?" He nodded. "See, that's my immunity."

He asked in disbelief, "Immunity? You have immunity to magic?"

"Yes, that's how I killed the Royals, and all of their magicians."

Once again, flashes of my life. We were getting closer and closer to the present.

Yelena's time as food taster flashed by quickly. Then the fight in Brazell's manor; up until we were thrown into the dungeons. Our escape and me pulling Yelena into the empty cell – where we hid. Then the image stayed.

No! This was pure torture. No way, Lucian was _not_ going to witness my first night with Yelena.

"... And there's been no one in this world that I care for more. Until now." I heard myself say. "Yelena, you've driven me crazy. You've caused me considerable trouble and I've contemplated ending your life twice since I've known you. But you've slipped under my skin, invaded my blood and seized my heart."

In the silence that followed I heard my brother snort in amusement. Only he would find my love life amusing. In found this even more awkward watching with my brother than their own deaths. At least he knew what happened then, this was supposed to be private. Only between Yelena and I. Or so I thought.

"Oh, shut up."I huffed in annoyance.

"That sounds more like a poison than a person." Yelena said in response.

"Exactly. You have poisoned me." Even though we couldn't see anything, I can remember it just like it had happened yesterday. I can remember the softness of her lips against mine. How her sweet lavender scent overwhelmed me. And how good her warm soft body felt pressed up against mine. Even though we had been locked in a dark and dirty dungeon, we had become one. We had shared blissful moments and revealed our love for one another.

And the sounds were blocked out by Lucian laughing his ass off. I swear I wanted to punch him.

It was finally over. Thank you, dear Lord. Lucian was still chortling, although he had seen nothing, he had heard everything. And that was what was amusing to him. His little brother spending a night with the woman he loved. It probably wouldn't be so funny if it was the other way around, I grumped.

Then the world faded into splashes of colours again, and we were back in my room. Lucian was still laughing, until I launched myself at him. That, he wasn't expecting. We toppled to the floor and – although it would do him no harm – I brought I knife to his throat. Well, at least now my skills were evident.

"You're really something, Valek. You're certainly not the baby brother I remember. But that's good. You are a man now, and something tells me, that that girl was the one. She's gorgeous, let me tell you that, and you probably regret whatever wedged between you. You need to fix it. Compare the past, to the present and to what might happen in the future if you don't fix this. You'll find an answer." With a final mysterious smile, he was gone.

The present and future? I hadn't seen those. And then… Oh no! That means I would see Alexis and Ruben. No. that means they would see me. And that means… I had no time to finish that thought.

A dark shape was sitting on my windowsill. Ruben.

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**We hoped you enjoyed it, and we'll try and update the next chapter as soon as we can :D **

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**That's the only present we wish for this christmas ;)  
**


	2. Chapter 2

**Sorry for taking so long to update - It's my fault. I know it's really far past christmas - time's past so quickly! but I hope that you can still enjoy it - just imagine it's christmas time ;) But hey, at least we haven't waited until christmas to update again! ;) **

**A massive thanks to Karl for co-writing this with me :) She's written her note at the end :)**

**I hope you enjoy it,Please don't forget to review! **

**Harlequin & Karl :)**

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Groaning in annoyance, I collapsed on my bed. I refused to talk to him. I knew it was childish, but I didn't care. I'd had enough with all this ghost palaver.

I enjoyed seeing my brothers again, don't get me wrong. But I certainly didn't enjoy the painful memories that they brought back with them.

"Is that a way to treat your favourite brother?"

"Go away." I grumbled into my pillow.

"What was that? I couldn't quite hear you." He teased.

"I said, go away!" I sat up to glare at him. My exhaustion was catching up with me now. I'm guessing it was roughly two in the morning, and I still hadn't gotten any sleep from my long journey back from Sitia. I lay back down and closed my eyes. Hoping he'd take the hint and leave.

But of course, his traits of extreme stubbornness stayed with him—ghost or not. "Get up Valek, it's time to go."

"I'm not going anywhere. Especially not with you," I said in a venomous voice.

He made some kind of weird frantic movements with his arms and made odd sounds. I stared at him. He was insane. "You're not scared of ghosts?" he asked in disbelief.

"No, as a matter of fact, my girlfriend deals with them every day. Or has Lucian not gloated to you about it yet?" I said. Sarcasm dripped like thick syrup on every syllable.

"Oh yes, the Soulfinder. It's ironic really. I mean, you take lives and she makes sure dead peoples' souls make it to the right places." He snorted. "You could be a team. But we don't have much time for this now. I have to show you something."

"Great," I replied sarcastically. "More things to see." I rolled my eyes to emphasis my point.

"I'm glad you're so enthusiastic about this." He ignored my sarcasm and grinned wickedly as he grabbed me unexpectedly by the arm. And once again, my world melted into an array of bright colours.

The first thing I saw was the fire. Then the Keep, following with Yelena's lifeless body. And myself, standing by her side, checking for a pulse. I saw the worry creasing my face, and realized for the first time, how obvious my emotions were when I was around Yelena. Despite my efforts to keep my indifferent exterior.

"Look how worried you were about her, and you knew exactly where she was. But now, you have no idea where she is, and what is happening in her life right now. You don't even give a damn!" Ruben shouted at me.

"I _do_ give a damn," I said, terrified of him. He was right, and I was scared of the truth he was throwing in my face.

"Then why did you leave?" he demanded. For some reason, I was sure that it was either I give him an answer or we'd both walked away as ghosts.

"We had argument. I got mad and went home. I didn't want to disappoint her parents by letting them see me out of control."

"And since when is that the right way to resolve arguments properly? 'We had an argument. I got mad and went home,'" he mocked me. "Yes, because every time we have an argument, instead of trying to resolve it, we just turn our back on it and disappear. That's a great way to talk to people. No wonder you're such a hermit, if that's the way you solve everything. What if something happened to her after you left. You wouldn't even know. You probably wouldn't even care."

His words brought guilt to my chest. This is what I feared – the truth giving me a big slap in the face. "I–I didn't know. I wanted to…" I gave up with a sigh. It was no use. Nothing I could say could change what I have done or make it sound any better, and very rarely was I lost for words. I failed not only myself but Yelena too, and I had to accept that.

"Good, let's move on."

Any hopes of another brother not witnessing mine and Yelena's lovemaking flew out of the window. This time it was even worse since it wasn't in the darkness of the dungeons. And Ruben proved to be even more annoying about it than Lucian was.

I huffed in annoyance before blocking Ruben's view. He got the idea and turned around. I focused my attention back on the scene before me. We were so in love back then and I'd give anything to go back to how we were.

Although I was literally watching the two of us make love, it didn't seem weird at all. Well, okay, maybe a little weird, but only in the sense that I couldn't experience it firsthand. Though I can remember it, the length of time makes it fuzzy and not the same.

I walked up to the bed as Yelena and I slept. Crouching down next to Yelena, I reached out a hand to stroke her face. But instead of stroking her soft skin, my hand went straight through her. I frowned before trying again. I huffed in annoyance before leaning back on the heels of my boots.

Of course I couldn't touch her. This is the past. And due to my stupid mistakes that's all it will ever be. But I still found it impossible to comprehend not being able to touch her again, or pull her into my arms, hell I'll probably never see her again.

Sadness wrecked through me and I dropped to the floor. Burying my face in my hands, I jumped when I felt a hand hesitantly touch my shoulder a few minutes later.

"Are you crying?" Ruben asked, incredulous.

"Of course not. I'm just thinking. I'm trying to find a solution. It would be helpful if you would shut up," I told him. I looked up. My vision was blurry but I knew it wasn't obvious from the outside. Or at least I hoped not, the last thing I needed was for him to tease me about becoming an emotional wreck.

"We don't have time to shut up. I have things to show you."

"But I don't want to"—my protests were cut off with the world fading into a colourful spiral again.

"We're here," Ruben announced. I huffed in annoyance. I was not getting up. Ruben tugged on my arm. "Come on, Valek. You have to get up." I didn't budge. There was no way he was going to get me to stand up and…

"I don't care Valek. This is important to me. Can't you just behave this once?" Yelena shouted at me. I looked up. This was a month ago. The first argument of many. I had been sent by the Commander to kill a young magician, but Yelena had shown up and stopped me.

"Behave. Yes, because I am a misbehaving child." my voice was filled with cold sarcasm. "I'm not a child Yelena. I'm a grown man and I can make my own decisions. I have orders to obey and they state that any magician born in Ixia is to be executed on sight."

"Valek, please listen to me. Don't do it. It doesn't have to be this way." She stood with her arms outstretched, protecting the girl behind her. "Don't. It isn't right."

I sighed, tired of her constant interference in my work. I had always ridded Ixia of magicians, and this one was no different. She was just more annoying as of late. This was the reason I avoided relationships in the past. I knew this would happen, that they would get in the way of my job, I just thought Yelena would be different.

Then I did something that I knew was wrong. That usually I wouldn't have dared, but in the past, I didn't know what it would lead to. I reached out and pushed Yelena aside, shoving her onto the floor. Then I finished the girl.

Yelena's ear-piercing screams echoed through my mind as I stared down at my hands. Covered in blood, they were solid proof of what I had done. When I looked back at Yelena, her eyes were wide and filled with tears. Her hand was covering her open mouth, trying to suppress the sobs from leaving, but it didn't work. Each sob wracked through my body like a hot iron. I knew she would be angry with me, but the look of intense hatred and disgust she sent me almost broke me.

I knew she would be horrified with what I did. But I thought she would understand.

As much as I loved her, I would always follow Ambrose's command. She may have my heart, but it's Ambrose who I made the blood oath to, not her. Even though I would do anything for her, even if it risks my life, I can't disobey him.

Ambrose had ordered me to kill the girl, and despite Yelena's protests and how much I knew it was wrong, I had to do it. I didn't know if Yelena would forgive me. Although I didn't blame her if she never did, I prayed that it wouldn't happen.

With one last heartbreaking sob, she turned away from me and ran out of the room. I groaned and tugged at my hair in frustration. I vaguely remembered they were still dripping with blood, but I didn't care. I didn't care about anything, Yelena had left and I doubt she would want to see me again.

Then anger surged through me. She knew what I did. She knows what my job is. Hell, she's even seen me kill before, right in front of her. So why does it only bother her now? If she didn't like it then why love me?

I never asked for her love. I never asked for any of it. Of course I don't regret loving her, I could never do that. But the hassle that comes with a relationship is just far too much trouble.

With another groan, I ran after her. By now she was far ahead, but it didn't take me long to catch up.

"You know I had to do it."

She stopped and span around, making me almost run into her. I took a step back when I saw the expression on her face. I may be a master assassin, but nothing is more intimidating than Yelena when she's angry.

"You had a choice! You don't have to follow his every command like a lost puppy. I begged you not to do it, but I guess that wasn't enough was it? I could have been dying and you'd still do it." That hurt. Doesn't she know by now how much she means to me?

"No, I… I love you. I didn't have a choice. It was a direct order from the Commander himself. You know I can't refuse."

"Yes you can!" she shrieked at me. "Why can't you think for yourself? Do you even have your own brain? It doesn't look like it right now." She turned away and started to walk away. I grabbed her arm. "Don't touch me," she snapped. I let go. She turned violently and stalked away from me. I followed her.

"Yelena, please," I begged.

"Please what? What do you want this time?" she demanded. "Because that's all you ever do—take. And I, like the fucking idiot I am, give it all. So why don't you ask. So that your precious loyal little girlfriend can satisfy you and _your_ fucking needs again. And then you can just dump her in a fucking corner, like always. When you come back, she'll still be there and she'll take you back with outstretched arms." Tears streamed down her cheeks.

"No, Yelena, no. I… No. You mean so much more to me. I'm sorry. I love you. I _can_ think for myself. I can. But I swore… Yelena, forgive me? Please?" I asked.

"No."

A knife sliced through my heart. "W-what?" I stuttered.

"No. Didn't expect that did you?" she asked with a laugh. I shook my head meekly; it was the only answer I could give her. "You expected me to come running back into your arms. Well guess what? Until you learn to respect me, respect yourself and think with your own head, you can go to hell." She turned and walked away.

I stood there stunned and heartbroken, looking like a complete moron until she was out of sight.

"What happened there?" Ruben's voice startled me. I jumped. I had been completely transfixed on the scene.

"What?" I asked.

"What was that? Why didn't you go after her again? Or tell _her_ to go to hell?" Ruben demanded.

"I figured she just needed time to cool down, until she wanted to talk to me again. And I could never say that to her."

Ruben raised an eyebrow in disbelief at my excuse. Realizing he wasn't going to give up, I heaved a big sigh of exasperation before answering again.

"Fine. Yelena's really scary when she's angry. I may be a master assassin, but even I wouldn't interfere with her wrath."

As I expected Ruben laughed at my real reason. It didn't bother me though, everyone seems to think that just because I'm an assassin, I'm fearless. Well, I'm not. In fact, most of my worst fears involve Yelena, the main one being losing her. But I guess that ones already become a reality. And all because I was too much of a coward to confront her and beg for her to take me back.

_God, I'm an idiot!_

"Come on, Valek. One more thing," Ruben urged me to continue. I stood frozen. I refused to see another one of mine and Yelena's episodes. But my brother ignored my protests and refused to give in. He pushed me out of the stupor I had been standing in and into the small clearing.

I swallowed hard. This was the place I had abandoned Yelena in. The final straw that led to me turning around and leaving her.

A small fire produced a small amount of light that glowed in the clearing. Yelena knelt next to it and warmed her hands. "Valek, what's wrong?" she asked. He voice was soft, quiet, loving. I missed it.

"Nothing. I'm fine," I lied easily. The Commander was threatening to end my interactions with Yelena if I continued to let her interfere with my work.

"Don't say that." She moved closer and leaned forward so she was lying over my back while I sat. "I know you better than that." She touched her lips to my jaw, kissing it softly. "What's wrong, sweetheart? Hmm…" she breathed into my throat. "Tell me." I reached over my shoulders to hold Yelena closer. I tugged her down into my lap. Cradling her, I attempted to ignore her mouth while it tasted my skin.

It was hard to believe that such a tender embrace had transformed into a shout-fest.

I tilted my head so that I could kiss her lips. Even from the outside, I could tell how distant the kiss had been. Yelena pulled away and started to move out of my embrace. My former self's arms tightened. "Stay. Please. I need you," I heard myself whisper.

Yelena settled back into my arms. She pleaded, "Then tell me what's bothering you. We have to be honest with each other if we want this to work out."

I sighed. "It's the Commander," I gave in.

"What about him?" my love questioned.

"He's… not entirely approving of my relationship with you." I had chosen my words with care, hoping to appease the revelation that was to come. Yelena waited patiently for me to elaborate. "He thinks I should be more focused on my duties and less on you." I stopped there, letting her come to her own conclusion before I revealed the Commander's way to resolve the problem.

She remained silent. I led her on, "He thinks you interfere with my work. And I can't allow that to happen."

Yelena's expression hardened. She removed herself from my arms. "Why not? Am I not important enough?" she demanded. "What is it with you? The both of you. I understand that, for you, a relationship is on a completely different plan than your work. But trying to help you make the good decisions is _not_ interfering."

"Yelena…" I sighed. I hadn't wanted to fight. We had been going on a trip, Yelena's mother had _insisted_ on meeting me. I wasn't too happy about that. "Let's not fight. We've been doing too much of that lately."

"No. I need to know why. You can't keep doing this." She stood. I looked up at her face. She was angry, that was easy to see, even from my current viewing point.

"Yelena, please," I heard myself beg.

"Valek, I swear to God, sometimes I regret"—she cut off abruptly.

"You regret what?" I demanded, rising and facing her.

"Nothing."

"Yelena," I warned. "Don't test me. You regret what?"

"Test you?" she demanded. "Yes, because I'm a misbehaving child, testing the authority." She snorted without humor. "I am your _equal_, Valek. You have no authority over me I could test."

"Yelena. What. Do. You. Regret?" I repeated.

"Why should I answer that? Am I _testing_ you again?"—she cut in.

"Yes, you are. I might not have any real authority, but I _am_ the man in this relationship, and that requires some submission from you. Now what do you regret?"

"Submission?" Her eyebrows shot up. "I'm not a dog Valek. And I certainly do not have to _submit_ to you. You being a man justifies nothing."

I had grown tired of her avoiding my question. I grabbed her arm roughly. "Be quiet," I ordered. I was surprised to find that Yelena shut up. "You regret what?" I demanded.

A single tear ran down Yelena's cheek. She struggled against my firm hold. "Please let go," she whispered, more tears following the first one. I stood firm and waited for an answer. "You're hurting me. Please, I didn't mean it," she said, her sobs leaking into her speech.

I pushed her away from myself, letting go in the process. Yelena stumbled to the ground, where she curled into a little ball. "Sometimes I regret loving you," she whispered, rubbing her upper arm where I had taken hold of her.

The pain that sliced through my chest at those words at that moment was just as real as the one I felt now while watching the scene as an observer. I struggled to catch my breath for a second.

Yelena had turned away from me, crying now. "Just go away."

My former-self didn't respond. I gathered my things and, with an enraged expression on my face, left. In my mind at the time, she had crossed the line. Now, it was me who had crossed the line.

I didn't have any more time to dwell on it though, since my world faded into spiraling colors.

Since I was still wallowing in my own self pity from the last scene, it took me a while to realize I was back in my room. It was hard enough experiencing it the first time, but seeing it again from a different perspective, I realized what an idiot I was. If I disobeyed Ambrose for once in my wasted life, or was brave enough to go after Yelena, and then things might be different.

* * *

**Hey, this is Karl. And I have a question for the readers of Unraveling Worlds. I know the story isn't very popular… But I keep writing it because, personally, I think it's a very good story and I'm proud of it. But. Butbutbut. Right now, I'm at 99 reviews. And my last chapter was pretty full of suspense. I was wondering… You know… If I could maybe get to, at the very least, 100 reviews for my efforts? I work really hard on that story and I'm kinda sad there aren't any more readers. ):**

**Also, for the blog. Harlequin and I are currently working hard on getting Valek's answers to the questions. He hasn't killed us yet, which is a good sign, sooo… (: The blog will be updated at the same time as the next chapter of Valek's Poison Study.**

**As for Chances, chapter three was sent to our beta—Children-of-the-Blood—but she is very busy with school work at the moment, so it might take a little while longer until we update.**

**Okay, I have a special thank you to give. I don't know if you're reading this, but KIxia, you very much saved my life. Dark Secrets was kinda going downhill if you hadn't stepped in. I'm glad you did and your idea is G-e-n-i-u-s. Thank you so much. :D**

**Monster in the Mirror should be updated soon. It's just that Harlequin and I want to stay fairly in advance on the posts, so we have to finish the chapter we are currently working on before you can read chapter one.**

**I think that's it for me (: Oh, and one more thing. If you have any questions you want to ask my characters (even the new ones I made up and in any one of my stories) you can leave them in your review. Either for this story or for the one the character is in. The answer to your questions will be posted on our blog—which can be found at ****http:/ramblingsoftheundecidedfuture (dot)blogspot(dot)com/ (just replace the (dot) with an actual period :)**


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